Of course, today, when I finally get back to writing after something of a hiatus (which sounds fancier than ‘extended bout of procrastination’), I’d like to talk about language. Language and the little tidbits of information that I have on language and how interesting the English language is, not necessarily in that order.

English is my first language. Thank God for that, because if English wasn’t my first language, I think I’d just about pass out. I have seen multiple people struggle over pronouncing various words and I don’t blame them. I still don’t know why we pronounce ‘colonel’ as ‘coronel'(Actually, I do know why, but the logic makes no sense to me). English is also the weirdest language that I have ever encountered. Only 44 words follow the ” ‘i’ before ‘e’, except after ‘c'” rule. 993 don’t. All of those words break that rule. Please explain this to me. Why do ‘pony’ and ‘bologna’ rhyme? And why don’t ‘cough’ and ‘tough’?

However, English is not the only language I speak. I am fluent in 5 languages and am learning another currently. Based on my fluency with languages, I can also say, English is the least scientific language ever. In every other language in the world, each object has a particular gender and sentence formation actually makes sense. Not in English. No, no. Is this some sort of cruel joke. Because it’s not funny.

Why is German the only male language?

Why do the two remaining people who speak Ayapaneco refuse to speak to each other? Your language is dying for heaven’s sake. 

Why can each verb in Archi have up to 1.5 million conjugations? I was having trouble even learning 6 for Spanish class in fifth grade.

Why does Papua New Guniea have 870 languages? I can barely learn six.

Languages are so weird.